9/29/2005

And the ramifications...

So, as per my previous post, I got home at 1:30 last night. It turns out that the alarm at work auto-engages at 1am. Needless to say, our HR rep happily reminded me of this fact because she got called at 1 am last night and was sent this picture:



Heh. With all my gear, I look like I'm robbing the place. Security cameras make you look a little scary...
Sometimes I feel like a nut...

Yeesh, so I got home yesterday thinking that Joe was home and fed Vincent. Sure enough, Vincent had some food - but no Joe! o_O Strange... I figured maybe he had gone out for the evening or something. So this morning, I'm getting geared up for my ride into work, bike out in the driveway warming up, and I see Joe walking towards me... O_o odd... turns out that he had to work a late shift and was just coming home from work! Yikes!

Something is wrong when I get home from work at 1am and my roomate gets home at 9am the next day. Something is very wrong with that... >_<
bleargh.

I enjoy my work, it's a good challenge. But I just got home. 15 hr work days are the suck. 9:00am -> 1:00am with an hour lunch == not cool. And any of you who know me know that people who don't do quality work, or even check their work reaaaalllyyy is a pet peeve... >:-O

grrrrrr.... on cleaning up other people's messes....

grrrrrrrRRRRRRRRR!!!!! >:-O

Anyways, I have to get a nap in before another day of work tomorrow. Whee. I feel like I'm in college all over again. Except without all the friends and videogames and campus and such. >_<

9/26/2005

One more...

Add Jon Foreman (Switchfoot) to that list from a few posts ago. Just listen to "On Fire" and you'll see why. It's got an interesting combination of naturalistic touch as well as a gentle synth feel in the background of the vocals. Gorgeous song.
The world is ending!

Our government's secret stash of sharks with frickin' 'lasers' on their heads has escaped and are terrorizing the world!!!

... wait, that's just ridiculous ...

It's just the killer dolphins trained to shoot poison dart guns to track down the terrorists.

Excerpt:
'My concern is that they have learnt to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises. If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire,' he said. 'The darts are designed to put the target to sleep so they can be interrogated later, but what happens if the victim is not found for hours?'

*sigh* it's a fascinating world we live in, never a dull moment...

9/25/2005

Damn. Damn a lot.

Okay, so I helped Joe count the quarters in his Twilight Zone pinball machine tonight. He's been putting quarters in there occassionally since he bought it about seven years ago. You wanna know how much money was in there?

SIX HUNDRED FORTY EIGHT DOLLAR AND SEVENTY FIVE CENTS.

Do you have any idea how heavy nearly SIX HUNDRED FIFTY DOLLARS in quarters is!?!?! Joe had guessed there was three hundred in there, my guess was closer to five hundred, we both underestimated quite a bit. Regardless, this newfound wealth may have convinced him to buy the Death Star, which would make wonderful company for the Star Destroyer that he currently owns. Although I have a ton of cool legos my inner child would love, none are more than a hundred bucks.

So yeah.

SIX HUNDRED FORTY EIGHT DOLLAR AND SEVENTY FIVE CENTS IN QUARTERS!?!?! JEEZ! O_O

9/18/2005

Long time no post.

Yeesh, no kidding. Pretty much everything in my life has been neglected recently. My cat, my motorcyle, Kim, my friends, my family, and even my video gaming time. So here I sit at my computer, a beer on one side and a bag of sour patch on the other, sitting in my new comfy computer chair with a stomach full of reheated chinese food leftovers. Sound sad? Sometimes feels like it. What's worse is that I'm sitting here waiting for something to finish so I can do some more stuff for work tomorrow. Yeesh.

Needless to say, life's been insanely busy with work recently. Got a whole tone to do before the next expansion ships, and just putting out fires takes up the majority of the days. My actual dev time has been cut to less than half recently, which is a little depressing. Been putting in long hours, but but it's nice to come in the next day and have things running smooth :) Also seems like the people I work with appreciate my efforts as well, which is a cool feeling. Just busy, that's all. Many times I've felt like "Well if I don't do it, noone else will." Or they will, but not until it's a huge priority and many other people are gated, which makes me sad.

Anyways - too much work stuff. I got to see Kim this weekend, which was a blast, with the exception of our cats. It was like a freakin' warzone all weekend all my apartment became a nuclear winter of cat fur. >_< And after it's all over, they're both little angels with the Puss in Boots eyes - you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, how can you get mad at a cat that looks like that?

My poor bike has been neglected over the last couple of weeks, and has been sitting in the garage more than it's being ridden, which is sad - it's a beautiful bike, but I've just been at work too late recently, and the weekends have all been quite packed, so I'm hoping to do some maintenance on it this week and take it out this weekend, but we'll see.

I've also been inspired to draw again. Been flipping through some more art sites online, specifically anime. After buying the Megatokyo manga and a few more while in California, I'm starting to see things from an artist's eye again. I even cracked open the untouched sketchbook I got as a gift. Couldn't bring myself to draw in it yet, though...

*it's about at this point wher previously mentioned beer was spilled all over my keyboard. keyboard is disassembled, washed, put out to dry, and a week passes by...*

So yeah, and a week later, I finish my post. I've looked back at some of my unfinished artwork, and I think I might jump back into them and see if I can complete them. (When I see something that captures my attention, I'll normally grab a screenshot of it and start a piece about it - digital, nowadays).

As per music, one of the things that really seems to get to me is the vocals (don't get me wrong, I love all the pieces that compose a song, especially guitar, but there's something about the vocal talents of some artists I really like). There's just something very inspirational about it. The ones that I can think of off the top of my head are: Amy Lee (Evanescence), J.R. Richards (Dishwalla), Jason Wade (Lifehouse), Anna Nalick , Bradon Boyd (Incubus). It always depends on the songs, but it can be breathtaking. I think I'm just envious of people when they can really portray passion through any medium. Especially in a manner where other people that share in their passion. I was complimented on my voice once, but I don't particularly see it. Then again, I'll never hear my voice with an unbiased ear. I try to show my passions through other forms, when I have the oppurtunity. It's that drive that really makes me do most everything I do.

And, just a random goofy link: why game designers shouldn't be fashion designers.

I did, however, get to finally take my bike out this weekend - went out to see some areas of Austin that are at a higher elevation on Saturday morning, with a bright sunny day. Totally relaxing, no rush to get anywhere, very nice.



I even got a chance to tune it up a little this weekend, tighten the chain, check all the fluid levels so it runns a little nicer. Even got a pic of me in my gear this weekend, and got to go riding with my roommate Joe (although his 'Busa has almost 1000 miles compared to the 350 ish on my Thundercat).

Still dealing with some fear while on my bike though. I feel confident on my bike when at speed, but ever since my accident, have had difficulty leaning the bike over in 90 degree turns. I just keep getting afraid the same thing is going to happen, so I end up slowing down a whole lot when I make those turns. It wouldn't be a problem doing that and slowly getting the confidence up if it weren't for the people who get damn annoyed on my tail when I slow for those turns. Not too bad, I'm still gonna take it slow, build the confidence over time.

Another week of work is starting up - hoping this one won't be too stressful. Just living day by day - trying to get some joy out of each one. Live's too short to spend it stressed about the little things. SMILE! *^_^*

Enjoy life. Life is worth living. Life should be a joyous thing. - Kamla Saund (my grandmother)

8/31/2005

*groann* -_-

Yeesh, just finished pulling a 16 hr day at work. Needless to say, I am draaained. -_-

But you know what's an awesome feeling? Being respected by the people that you work with. Pretty badass, to say the least. Makes it all worth it. :)

Also, that last post was awfully melancholy. Sometimes I'm just in those moods. *shrugs* Still agree with all of it, just a little dreary reading it again. But yeah.

My bike is all kinds of fun - took it up to the Oasis yesterday - one of the best views of the lake / hills in Austin. Makes you feel like you're visiting another country. Gorgeous. Next time I'll bring my camera.

Anyways, to bed. I have the pager this week, and it could go off at god-awful-early in the morning again >_<.

g'night world.

*cough* *cough*

8/22/2005

Musings

It's been a long time since I was able to sit down and listen to music, not just as background noise.

Take me over when I'm gone

I had forgotten how much it inspires me, even it it's just to sit back and think. I've been doing a lot of that recently.

Take me over when I'm strong

Not totally sure why, but I really miss it. I think that may just be because there are a lot of parts of my life that I haven't been in touch with that I miss. I'm on the way back from Tony's wedding, the second of my friends to have gotten married recently. (Congrats Tony and Kate!)

Spending time with my old friends really reminds me of how much I miss all of them. Maybe it's that I miss the

You're just in sight, will you save my life again.

time where we were all within 10 miles of each other and the idea of all of us getting together and crashing at someone's house on any given night was only a few phone calls away.

Spending time with all of my friends and really thinking about the past I've had with them (and how long it's been) and the future to come is really sobering at times. I'd like to have more get togethers with everyone more often (maybe even not because of a wedding, but just because, as per Tony's suggestion). It also brings an interesting sense of mortality to the surface,

Cause I can't stand up, but I can't fall down, cause I'm somewhere in the middle.

which I'm not sure is brought upon by our relative ages and maturity (or lack thereof) or because of the fact that Sean could actually be deployed at any given moment. Sent to another country to fight, possibly to the death. It just seems to surreal. Or it may be because of my own events. For those that don't know, I bought a motorcycle. 16 days later I totalled it.

I'm coming round to open the blind. You can't hide any longer. My god you need to rinse those puffy eyes.

Thank god I was wearing all my gear. To make a long story short, I took a turn, and a combination of slick tires, a steeply sloped road (unbeknownst to me at the time) and inexperience caused my back tire to slip and wreck into a curb. Just some rash of my arm - all healed up now, but I see the sight of the curb coming towards me, sideways, while I was on the bike sliding against the road every time I get on my new bike. Much more careful this time.

Why did I choose to play this game, this goes too far I'll take no more.

Are you happy? Are you doing the things that you wanted to be going when you were here in your life? If you died now, would you be satisfied with where your life had taken you up until this point? We dwell too damn much on the little stupid things in life. Myself probably being one of the worst out there.

I bought some manga while in Palo Alto for Tony and Kate's wedding, to read ont he plane and because it had been a long time since I'd read any. The guy sitting in the window seat on my aisle in the plane stepped on my bad when getting to his seat and bent / tore part of the spine on one of them. I didn't realize this until I was halfway through

And love without a dream, it will not survive.

reading it, but when I did discover it, it bugged the hell outta me so much I couldn't enjoy reading the last half of it. I sincerely doubt the status of the spine of this manga will significantly impact my life in the long run. Too damn petty.

Reading my newly acquired manga

Let me in to see you in the morning light.

also reminded me of how much I miss drawing. Just seeing the dynamism, and emotions portrayed in the character's faces through each pane reminds me of what I love about drawing. That ability to dump my emotions onto something tangible, something existent in the world

Wish I could be every little thing you wanted over time.

and even if noone else in the world understand it, I do. Better yet, I hope they fully understand it, irrelevant of whether they understand it the way I did. Oh yeah, if you wanted to IM, call or email me with an "I told you so", or "I can't believe you got another bike," etc about my wreck, just go ahead and speak your mind now, talk to your computer screen, get it out of your system, and don't include me. Thank you.

Kim's starting law school tomorrow, about 96 miles north of where I live. Suck. Sher's not too excited about the whole thing right now, primarily because of the rumors of insanity. I hope she enjoys it, or at least doesn't regret

She's only yours tonight, oh she never cries. And I know there's pain inside.

it a few years from now. Still, I miss having her in town. Although I've been at work so much (and working while at home) that may be irrelevant. I've kinda kicking my ass right now. I'm excited to do what I'm doing, but it's not easy. My primary fault is that I want to do everything we're doing right, and in our time frame, it's not always possible. The worst part is that although it's kicking my butt, I want more responsibilities. I enjoy having an impact on the game, and I really feel like

... turn your tray tables and seat backs to their full and upright positions.

I think I really miss having a creative ourlet. I even picked up my guitar back up last week and noodled around for the evening. Man, did my fingers hurt, but it sure felt good to head. I also discovered that my acoustic musings (randomly plucking strings and chords here and there) put Vincent to sleep. He actually passed out sitting upright on my shoes while I played, go figure. At least he seems to have stopped waking me up at 4 in the morning. For now.

For those of you that have

Welcome to Austin ladies and gentlemen, it will take a few minutes for the captain ...

known me for some time, you know that I don't remember my dreams, but I dream vivid ones. I also haven't had nightmares since I was a little kid. But recently my dreams have been odd - incredibly vivid, and a few times quite frightening. So vivid that I have to look around and convince myself that the stuff in the dream

*DING*

didn't actually happen. It's just odd. Maybe it's because I'm finally starting to get sleep (since Vincent lets me) and my body is pissed off.

*meow* *meow* *MEOW* *purrrrrrrr* *puuurrrrrrrrrrr* *meow* *chomp* *chomp* *chomp*

Anyways, chances are if you're reading this, I miss you and would like to hear from you. I'd love it if you emailed, IMed, called or left a message here.

*sigh* anyways, it's later, and I have to to work very soon.

This is your life, are you who you want to be?