7/21/2003

So here I sit in the CS lab in Painter - the stereotypical CS major, sitting at a computer, wearing taped up glasses, surrounded by other CS majors working on projects. "No, no, no the string won't work for this - we need to change the class." "Yeah, alright let's try this." It slowly fades into a low murmur of ununderstandable gibberish.

I just walked by Jester for the first time after Orientation this year - I drove up, and half expected to see fellow Orientation Advisors walking out of the building, or cluttering up the lobby. Instead I saw a cleaning woman through the glass doors, sweeping up the dusty floor of the entrance. I walked into the Jester West concourse and into Jester store, and as I left I could literally see the tables set-up for check in - people running around to organize the 1000 people to come through that week. Smiling faces separating parent from child... and it started to hit me - never again. Simply put - never again. Never would I cheer on the aisles of opening session on Day 1, or give a monologue at Diversity. Never again touch people through CI or be able to run up and scream on stage or cheer in the aisles of Traditions, belting out the Fight song. Never again would I be able to walk down to the Jester lobby to be surrounded by friends. Never again would I be able to try and help the program, or make a memory CD (the irony of that statement is rather entertaining) And never again would I have the chance to meet a group of 90 AMAZING people, and try to make as many friends as possible in the short half-year we're together. I think it's starting to hit me.

*sigh* I think I'm going to cry.

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